Monday, July 25, 2011

work email: picture day

this seems pretty self explanatory to me, but if it doesnt "just hit your call button and i'll have tommy come back there and hit you in the head with a tack hammer because you are a re- tard"



From: Faran
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 1:43 PM
To: AU - All
Subject: Picture day

All
Tomorrow I’ll bring camera to take every body’s picture for our new website, please dress appropriately.

Agents,
You can have about 1-2 short paragraph on the website (OPTIONAL) to describe yourself, your profession and your qualifications. If you are interested please e-mail that to me ASAP.

Remote agents,
Please e-mail me your photos or come to the office tomorrow.


Thank you

Faran | IT Manager

 

From: Nick
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 1:49 PM
To: Faran
Subject: RE: Picture day

Can we make it themed? Ie. Hawaiian, black tie, s&m, care bears, polka, 50’s, 70’s, anime, farm animals etc????

I guess I need some clarification on “appropriately” – I don’t wanna be the only one wearing a ball gag……talk about awkward!

Nick | Agent

 
From: Faran
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 1:50 PM
To: Nick
Subject: RE: Picture day

Dress however you want to be presented to your clients and the world!


Thank you

Faran | IT Manager

 
From: Nick
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 1:52 PM
To: Faran
Subject: RE: Picture day

So what you’re sayin Faran is a few whips and chains would add a nice touch to my leather zippered suit?

Nick | Agent

 
From: Faran
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 1:55 PM
To: Nick
Subject: RE: Picture day

That’s cool with me, we can even borrow Greg’s bike so you can stand in front of it.


Thank you

Faran | IT Manager

 
From: Nick
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 2:00 PM
To: Faran
Subject: RE: Picture day

Faran……I love it. props - now you’re thinkin. What else could we cram in there….maybe a camel or a blow up sheep? Throw in  a cake and some glitter – we could just make a party out of it tomorrow and people can get involved however they want…..and you can photograph it for us and use the best pic for the website. A kind of “in their natural surroundings” kinda shot ya know?

Oooh we should get one of those slip n slides and throw that in here too – down the halls and stuff

I like where you’re goin with this Faran, what else ya got?

Nick | Agent

 
From: Faran
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 2:06 PM
To: Nick
Subject: RE: Picture day

We can ask some of the girls to take their shirts off or wear wet shirts and stand in the back ground. I’m pretty sure that will attract some of our clients.


Thank you

Faran | IT Manager

 
From: Nick
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 2:21 PM
To: Faran
Subject: RE: Picture day

That’s subtle Faran, but I think we should shy away from the whole sexual harassment side of things. After all we want this picture to say, “Insurance business name here, your one stop shop for insurance”

We don’t want it to say, “Insurance business name here, home of scantily clad babes and customer appreciation Thursdays where everyone gets a free prize”

But then again, you’re the IT dept – you’re the web designer – I trust your judgment on these sorts of things.

Should I bring a 5 gallon jar of oil tomorrow? You know for the slip n slide?

Nick | Agent
 
From: Faran
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 2:36 PM
To: Nick
Subject: RE: Picture day

Well, we can put that picture in the kitchen for entertainment. 5 gallon should be enough for these girls!


Thank you

Faran | IT Manager

 
From: Nick
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 2:38 PM
To: Faran
Subject: RE: Picture day

Well I mean, I can get you 10 gallons if you think we need it – I mean it might cost us a lil, but I know a guy – I can get ya 10 gallons by tomorrow.

Nick | Agent

 
From: Faran
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 2:41 PM
To: Nick
Subject: RE: Picture day

5 should b good


Thank you

Faran | IT Manager

 
From: Nick
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2011 2:57 PM
To: Faran
Subject: RE: Picture day

Alright, if people complain of rug burns I am sending them to you


Nick | Agent
 

Friday, July 15, 2011

4th 'o july

this is how we roll:


vid one: the fireworks strapped to logan's windmill project for school - see before pics and vid

windmill meltdown



and then vid number 2:
phil and i and our annual roman candle wars


god bless america

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

the ruler of ballsonya, in theaters just in time for the holidays!

so you've seen our shenanigans via pictures. however, its much more realistic when you get to see the video. in true dale fashion, this is fucking hilarious. this is aliumicock, in all of his glory.....scaring the shit out of platte river state park....enjoy:

alumicock